Chapter 5 - A Silent Heartbeat
Saka POV
It had been more than two weeks since my first meeting with Saskia and Winda. This afternoon, after class, Arjuna invited me to hang out with him, Saskia, and Winda again. This was Arjuna's third invitation after I'd turned him down with various excuses. During that time, Winda and I occasionally exchanged messages. She was always the one to initiate. Once, we ran into each other in the campus cafeteria. Winda asked why I hadn't joined Arjuna and the others that time. In the end, I told her that I had to divide my time and energy between college and work, so I didn't have much left for having fun. I could see the surprise on Winda's face. But contrary to what I'd expected, she remained friendly and kept messaging me. Winda was even more eager than Arjuna to get me to come along this time.
I walked to the parking lot Arjuna had mentioned earlier. During our last class, we had different courses, so he asked me to head straight to the parking lot. I finished first, and rather than wait inside the classroom, I preferred to wait somewhere open. Near the rows of cars, there was at least a garden bench beneath the shade of some trees.
“Saskia...” Apparently, my mouth had a mind of its own. Suddenly, I was already greeting Saskia, who was sitting on one of the garden benches. She must have been waiting for Arjuna too.
“Saka,” she replied. I approached, but I didn't dare sit beside her even though the bench was big enough for two. “Why are you by yourself?” Winda should have been there. “Winda went to the bathroom. I decided to wait here. Where's Arjuna?” she asked, tilting her face up slightly to look at me standing there. I could see her slender chin and jaw more clearly. “He's not done yet. We had different classes.” “Oh...” Her reply was brief. “Sit down, Saka,” Kia added. I hesitated before finally sitting beside her. I wasn't good at talking to girls, but I'd never felt my heart pounding like this around anyone. I felt nervous near Saskia. Maybe it was because she was beautiful—the most beautiful girl I'd ever met. Saskia and I spent more time in silence. We both gazed into the distance. Even so, my heart still hadn't settled into a normal rhythm. From the corner of my eye, I could see her small ear. Her straight hair hung loose, reaching halfway down her arm.
“Saka, do you like living here?” Saskia's voice startled me. “It's okay,” I replied. “What about you?” “It's not too bad. Some of my high school friends also go to college here, including Arjuna, so I don't feel too alone.” She turned to me with a small smile. “That’s good.” I returned her smile. “What was Arjuna like in high school?” Saskia turned to face forward again. I imagined her furrowing her brow as she recalled the past. “The Arjuna from back then was just like the Arjuna you see now. He's always been that way. What do you think?” Her gaze remained fixed straight ahead. “He's fun to be around, kind, and there are a lot of things I admire about him.” “What are they?” This time, she looked at me. “He knows what he wants out of life, and he's passionate about pursuing it. He's also good at getting along with people, both men and women.” Then I remembered something. “But he never crosses the line.” Saskia smiled, then turned her gaze back to the grounds. “He's been popular from the very beginning. There's something about him that easily draws people in.” She fell silent for a few moments. “But I trust him. Thank you for being his friend.” “I should be the one thanking you. I owe Arjuna a lot.” Saskia looked at me again and smiled. “He likes being friends with you, Saka. Believe me.” I nodded. “Winda seems to like you too.” I let out a small laugh. “We just exchange messages.” “And?” “I don't know.” I simply shook my head. Saskia nodded several times. “Yeah... Suddenly living on your own, being a new college student, dealing with assignments, and... working. You must be overwhelmed. I understand.” “Really?” “Yeah... It's not good to force things. Isn't that right?” “Yeah.” We spent the rest of our waiting time enjoying the view of the parking lot until Winda and Arjuna arrived. A part of me wished they'd take a little longer to get there.
After our second outing as a group of four, Winda continued messaging me often. I replied simply. Sometimes she'd call, though more often she'd leave missed calls because I deliberately didn't answer. I remembered what Saskia had said: it wasn't good to force things, and that's what I felt right then. Eventually, her messages became less frequent and stopped altogether. A month later, I heard from Arjuna that Winda had gotten a boyfriend. I felt both relieved and sad. Relieved because Winda had found someone who wasn't me, and sad because it might mean I wouldn't get to see Saskia anymore. No... I wasn't going to take things too far beyond admiring my friend's girlfriend. It was just that being near Saskia, talking to her, or even simply imagining talking to her could calm me down. It was as if she understood without me saying anything—or maybe that was just an idea I'd planted in my own head, because the truth was that I barely knew her and had only spoken with her once or twice.
My fears proved unfounded when Arjuna invited me again on campus yesterday. At first, I thought it would just be the two of us, like usual whenever one of us wanted to go somewhere for a particular reason. But it turned out Saskia would be there too, and she would borrow her uncle's car. I was starting to doubt that it was really her uncle's car. Maybe it was Arjuna's car, left at her uncle's house here in Sibaru. I'd once accompanied him while he made a few modifications to that white car. This time, they were going to visit a waterfall on Saturday morning. Arjuna invited me because I liked nature, and Saskia didn't mind. My work shift didn't start until three Saturday afternoon. If I couldn't come, I had to let them know by noon at the latest so they could find a replacement if they felt one was necessary. I'd never taken a day off before, so I figured it wouldn't be a problem.
A little after six on Saturday morning, Arjuna's white car arrived in front of the boarding house. I immediately climbed into the back seat. “Did you get permission from work?” Arjuna asked. “Later. If we're back before noon, I won't need to ask.” “You're crazy... The trail slopes uphill. Even if we make it back by noon, your body will need to rest.” “Did you forget I'm a mountain kid?” “You've been a city kid for three months now.” I could see Saskia smile faintly at her boyfriend's response. Her hair was tied back this time. “We'll see.”
The waterfall we visited was quite far from the city. It took us more than an hour to get there. After that, we still had to walk uphill for about half an hour from the parking area to reach the site. The incline was pretty steep for people who weren't used to it, especially older visitors. The path was still natural too, and slippery in places because the slightly damp soil had been slicked by the shoes of visitors heading back down. Large trees grew thickly on both sides. Partway up, there was a wide open area that had been turned into a rest area. Several food and drink vendors were concentrated there, in addition to the ones below. Arjuna and Saskia decided to take a short break, and I followed them.
“Still holding up, Kia?” Arjuna asked between breaths. I wanted so badly to ask him the same thing.
Saskia nodded. “It'd be a shame not to make it to the top after coming this far, right?” Saskia wiped away her sweat. Her fair skin glistened slightly in the sunlight. The air was fairly cool, but climbing like that still made us sweat.
I took a seat across from them. “You should've brought your painting supplies, Kia. The scenery is incredible.” Saskia liked painting nature, though I suspected she was good at painting anything. I'd seen her paintings in photos from Arjuna. I didn't know much about art myself, but I enjoyed it. “Wouldn't it be a hassle to bring a canvas?” She looked at me. “You have Arjuna and me.” I glanced at Arjuna. “Okay. Next time we go somewhere, we'll bring your painting supplies. We'll visit beautiful places around this city. Right, Saka?” “Okay.”
After that, the three of us started going out together more often. Arjuna and Saskia never introduced me to any of their female friends again. I didn't feel the need to be introduced to anyone either. I grew even closer to Arjuna; he was both my best friend and my brother away from home. I also admired Saskia more and more, even though we didn't talk much.